“OH SHIT! I SEE IT TOO!”
*jaws drop all over the fucking room. Why are scientists so clumsy?*
I’m pretty happy today. Why? Well I’ve already become the office clown! I know, it’s pretty sudden and all that, but I’m a pretty outstanding candidate for the role and shit.
Check out the reasons why I’ve become the office clown/larrikin:
And THAT’S why you shouldn’t have ignored me/us, you stuck up whore.
Ever since I was a young adult (I’m so proud of you, Jobe!) I always wanted to live on a pirate ship and be the captain or first mate. But I wouldn’t want to be a part of just any pirate ship (mast?). I would have to be on the greatest pirate ship in the waterverse. I drew up a checklist of features of my desired pirate ship and developed the following criteria:
I’m pretty sure I’d have a great time on the high seas and everything would be ship shape (oblong?).
My biggest fears in life are:
But more specifically, black holes. I’m fucking sick of them. They really are everywhere. I was walking down the street today when I totally tripped over a crack and fell into a black hole. Luckily no one was watching so I wasn’t embarrassed. Although I did get a banana peel stuck on me, which I didn’t notice for like an hour.
I fucking hate those black holes that are everywhere. I mean, they’re handy for putting my rubbish in, but apart from that they suck. And they smell so bad!