OMGz a TRU stori on dis blog 4 unce.
So there’s this chick who sort of asked me out a couple of weeks ago. At first I said sure because all I knew about her was that she was sort of cute and, possibly, not scared of the dick.
Due to conflicting schedules we were unable to make any concrete plans initially. But during this time of non-dating (we still spoke briefly) I found out more of her and came to realise that I don’t particularly like her. Not that there’s anything particularly wrong with her, she’s just too particularly different for my liking (I’m a Selective Sarah, Choosey Suzie).
Today she sent me an email asking when we’re going to go out. I tell her to choose and day and I’ll lock it in (I make dreams come true). She chooses Saturday. I tell her that’s fine. I won’t be going anyway.
I spend the majority of the day thinking of how I can get out of the date and also make sure she doesn’t bring it up again.
I call her in the afternoon just before she goes home. The conversation goes thusly:
HER: “Oh, hey!”
ME: “How’s your day been?” <--softening the blow
HER: “Not bad. Glad it’s over.” Positivity?
ME: “Listen, I really hate to do this at such short notice, but can we move tomorrow night? This gorgeous girl I’ve had my eye on for months has finally let me take her out on a date but she’s only free for one night, sort of like a prison inmate who has been in gaol for most of his life then gets out but realises he can’t face the outside world so he goes and kills some dude then turns himself in the same day so he goes back to gaol.” Distraction.
ME: “I’m just so happy, (let’s call her…) Tina (because it’s her real name)! And I’m so lucky to have a friend like you who I can talk to about things like this.”
HER: “Oh… yea…”
I swear to God the only way it could have been better is if I heard one of her workmates in the background say something like “night, Tina. Have fun on your hot date tomorrow night! Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”