Blogs Without Borders

A big welcome to our new readers in Tasmania and New Zealand!

This blog is now available to people all across those regions on Friday nights.

I look forward to seeing them around and reading comments from them!

WTOMH Live! in Melbourne

Hi all,

I’ve only just gotten word that there is going to be a WTOMH Live! show in Melbourne tonight. Doors open at 8pm and it’s going to be HUGE so everyone should come down. Entry is a bargain at $20 on the door.

I know it’s late notice but this is a once in a lifetime chance to see your favourite WTOMH posts LIVE and IN PERSON.

Be sure to get there early, because this will sell out.

See you all tonight.

NOTE: No updates on the blog for a couple of days because I have some other media commitments down in Melbourne and I have to leave now to make the plane.

An Argument

Her: “Why does it feel like very time we get close you just push me away?”
Him: “It’s not like that at all!”
Her: “It is! Is it because you don’t want to be with me?”
Him: “No! I mean yes! I mean… I want to be with you, nothing’s wrong.”
Her: “So why can’t you commit?”
Him: “I do commit. We’re committed.”
Her: “This isn’t commitment!”
Him: “So what do you want me to do? Marry you?”
Her: “I guess that would be something…”
Him: “Okay! Fine! We’ll get married!”
Her: “…really?”
Him: “Actually, no. I don’t really want to get married yet.”

{{The Count}} [Encore Screening]

2

Just in case anyone missed it last time. It's pretty essential to understanding the next episode.

Phrases Including ‘Discotheque’ In Them

• “Hey, let’s go to the local discotheque!”
• “This discotheque is shit, everyone’s on pills.”
• “Let’s go to another discotheque because this one is shit and full of people on pills.”
• “That’s the largest discotheque I’ve ever seen!”
• “Excuse me. Do you know where the discotheque is?”
• “How much is entry to this discotheque?”
• “This discotheque is playing excellent music!”
• “Wow, Sneaky Sound System have really packed out this discotheque!”
• “That discotheque we went to last Saturday was quite nice.”
• “Did they have discotheques when you were young, mum?”

Hybrid Tea Madness

Determined to avoid the fiesty, rigid grip of green tea madness, I made a hybrid tea today, containing all of the teas I had on hand.

It’s fucken tasty/pink. But it’s drawing me in.

[picture of a warp thing]

Closer and closer

[magnified picture of warp thing]

HEY BABY CAN I TOUCH YOUR HEART REAL QUICK?

No it’s not a metaphor. Why do you ask? I don’t get all technical like that. Our love will be down the road. STRAIGHT DOWN THE ROAD.! <--{{DUAL PUNCTUATION}}

[more magnified picture of warp thing]

Iiiiiiiiiiii’mmmmm theeeerreeeeeee

[less magnified picture of warp thing, spliced with picture of crowd basically chilling out]

Baby on Boards: A Pictorial Excursion

Oh, there's a baby there. A board too. Does this image have it all?

How you like THAT baby on a board?

I'm on ur internets, postin on ur blogz

Jobe’s Weight Maintenance Blog

Starting Weight: 145kg
Last Weigh-In: 144kg
Current Weight: 145kg

How good is it! I’m finally back on track with the weight maintenance.

Things have been going really well. I’m getting back a lot of the self esteem that was missing and having the confidence to meet new people.

People are noticing the lack of change too. I don’t think anyone has commented that I look like I’ve lost weight. My friend Stacy even said that I don’t look like I’ve changed since the last time I saw her (just before I started my journey).

Good times!

Revolutionising Blogging

Okay, for the remainder of this post I’m going to blog with my eyes closed. Starting from….. NOW:

So today I went down to the shops and purchased many items. On the way to the shops, well on the way to one shop in particular, I encountered an oddly Aethnic man who was intently looking and fridges, IU didb;t wabt a fridge but I suddenly felt the need to obtain a fridge after seeing his actions.

But I didn’t have enough money for a fridge, unfortunately. O I didn’t get one. Not even a cheap one.

OKAY BACK NOW. Well wasn’t that fucking brilliant!

{{The Count}}

2

Another Shotest

Man, the quality of protests has been really shit lately. Every time I see another shotest I can’t help but cringe.

I really want to get the message across that this isn’t acceptable on a grand scale but I’m not sure how to do it.

Ya Boy Been Busy

Well the blogging bukkake hasn’t really happened like promised (yet) so I should apologise. But I won’t, because that would give the power in the relationship to you. And you know you like being treated like shit anyway.

I haven’t been blogging much because I purchased the new Rockstar game for PS3, Arrogant Worker.

It’s fucking awesome. Sort of like Grand Theft Auto but instead of doing crimes and shit, you do missions in a workplace aimed in getting to new levels of arrogance.

I’m going pretty well. I got heaps of points after I went for a walk in the city (you can explore EVERYWHERE, it’s great) and had a complain about some dry cleaning that took too long.

Right now I’m stuck at the mission where I have to force a hot girl to go out with me because I earn a bit more than her at work. I tried to emphasise all of my qualities to her (money, handsome, successful, nice suit) but she said no.

I’m looking for a walkthrough/cheat online now but can’t find anything yet.

A Pamphlet Saved My Life

Crazy happenings today. A pamphlet totally saved my life.

I was walking on the streets when some religious nut handed me a pamphlet which promised to help me save my soul. It was pretty gay so I went to throw it out.

But before I got the chance, some cunt drive-by’d me and I got shot about 50 times (with bullets). Amazingly, each one of the shots hit the pamphlet and I walked away unharmed (after throwing the pamphlet in the bin).

{{The Count}}

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Random Thoughts While... Eating Goat Curry

• People say there is no freedom in Iraq or Afghanistan. But sometimes I wonder. If I fucked then killed a goat over there no one would mind much. Here, not quite…

Attn: Guys, re: What we've got here

Guys, we’ve got another Chernobyl on our hands here….

Whatever

So my ex decided to tell me that she is over me.

That’s nice. A little weird though.



{{sad}}

I wish I could say the same...