What’s Up With... The amount of jelly used in cookbooks from the 1950s...

...and why the fuck are we not covering everything in jelly now?

A convincing argument in dot point form:

• Jelly coated lasagne
• Jelly coated pizza
• Jelly coated jelly
• Jelly coated 16 chocolate cheesecake
• Jelly coated jelly eating device
• Jelly coated fire
• Jelly coated rare Toto LP

Make this happen, someone. Please. For the love of all things right (and wrong).

Why do I feel that it is my calling to buy a cookbook from this era and make every recipe? And document it thoroughly?

A blog as interrupted by the child and father that were in the hairdresser while I was getting a haircut


DAD CAN WE GO FISHING


Sit down, Shane.

Prediction: A Post That Never Eventuated

Okay, this one would have been good if I could have been bothered. I was going to make a post about a huge news item and date it like 2 years ago. Then I’d say that I predicted it and that I’m a genius (of future). People would see the dates and freak out. And I’d keep it a tad vague so it looked like it wasn’t an obvious ploy.

Feel free to use this idea on your own blog, because it appears that I will not be using it.

Wardrobe Malfunction

People won’t stop harping on about the benefits of scarves and scarf-accessories. It’s really been shitting me a lot lately.

Why? Because I’ve been a scarf-wearing maniac for years now. And I don’t even like the things!

I just wear them because they keep my head warm. I mean, a lot of body heat disappears out of the head and scarves keep it in. And they’re good for keeping the sun out of the face on hot summer days. I burn easily so I need that function a lot (nb iScarf Nano?).

But I find it a bit annoying how you can’t wear them indoors without being considered rude. Old people get you to take them off and shit.

A Photoshopped Picture of a Puppy with Lobster Hands

The Ins and Outs of Being Post-Cool

I’m bring post-cool back (by taking it forwards). Check out what I’ve been into...

Out: Sour crème in food
In: Sour crème in food (still awesome. No change)

Out: “Lite” food
In: “Life” food (Ie food that had a life before it was killed)

Out: Gifts of Diamonds
In: Gifts of Water Features, Ponds, Sea Mammals, etc (most things aquarial = good)

Out: On-the-job training
In: Unemployment

Out: Indie music
In: World music (yeah, totally. I’m as surprised as you are.)

OMG Truth Serum

I knew where I was putting it. No “error” was made on my part.

{{OMG TRUTH SERUM}}

Curiosity Killed (The Cat)

So I was hanging out in a tree today. Mostly chilling on branches. Did I mention that it was my happy tree? Well it was. Anyway, I got rumbled by so many creatures it was just crazy.

Can't I just enjoy a moment of peace without a bird "dropping in for a chat"? <--rhetorical question. It appears that I cannot.

I now need to find a new peaceful spot. One totally devoid of animals and creatures.

Dilemma

"Ready to go, babe?"
"Nearly."
"This little day trip to the city will be most enjoyable."
"It certainly will, dear."
"I cannot wait!"
"Dear..."
"Yes dear?"
"I cannot help but feel that something is... missing... here."
"Missing?"
"Yes. I don't feel quite right."
"Hmmm. I know! Let's try putting sweaters over our shoulders for our city trip."
"But I'm not at all cold. It's quite hot outside."
"Exactly! That's why we wear them over our shoulders."
"Ah! Yes! This feels MUCH better!"

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