Grapefruit and Oysters - Little in Common

"How long have your balls smelled like grapefruit for?" she asked, moving her head away from my crotch.

That's a tough question to answer.

The first thought that came into my mind was that this was a trap question. If I admitted that my balls, yes, have smelled like grapefruit for quite some time then I am admitting that either the smell is pungent to a point of notice or, even worse, that I actively smell my own balls.

I should have been prepared for it. Everything else I did that night - every movement and word spoken - was done in order to get this girl's head buried in my crotch. Note: Not buried like a dead body. Buried like a treasure. A treasure of the flesh.

But I forgot the main thing: make sure your balls do not smell like grapefruit when the moment arrives.

But the second thought that came into my mind was whether or not grapefruits had a bad odour. Maybe she liked the smell and was curious as to how I had developed such a wonderful crotch.

And then it was 5 AM and I felt cold because the door was still open from seven hours ago, she she left, confused at my lack of talking.

And that's how I learnt to plan everything fully and to not cut corners.