New Feature

Hey guys, got a new feature to the site.

I've started doing DVD rentals.

So send me $10 and your home address and I'll send you a DVD to watch and then return.

The Swiss, The Proud

Yesterday I met a guy from Switzerland.

I said "oh, cool" and he said "yeah Switzerland is pretty awesome. Swiss chocolate, Swiss cheese, Roger Federer. There are a lot of things from Switzerland that people don't know about."

If I go overseas and people say "Australia? Oh, cool." I'm going to say the same thing.

But with different products obviously.

Animals

I went fishing today and a cat jumped into my boat. I was all holy crap a fishcat, etc. Then I realised that it was actually a small mermaid.

Well I say small mermaid, but I don't know what the correct size of a mermaid is. I was only going off legend and heresay.

Needless to say I won't be going fishing THERE again! (furious, may write a letter to council)

Lion

Bee

October

Peenotear

I'll win you over

Confidence shattered

Fireworks

Skinny Boy All Bones No Lies

So I had this odd twang of sadness the other day when I was thinking about a girl I used to date a while back. She was awesome. I really missed the sex. She was so skinny, a real model type body.

But then I put my penis in a box of aerosol cans and remembered what the sex was like and I no longer felt sad.

Relax Guys!

So the news is that Armenia is invading us. Bad shit, right?

Wrong! I've got your backs.

I've got a plan. I don't want to say too much right now (Armenians are pretty much my largest viewing segment on this blog) but I will say that it involves the following:

• Kelis' milkshake


• A yard


• A trap


• Rejoicement