Devious Plot

I got some food poisoning yesterday.

I can't wait to use it on someone.

Couldn't afford the antidote.

Should be okay though. You think?

Child Naming Rights

So I had twins the other day (yay). I named them Trebuchet (after my favourite font) and Arial (after my favourite little mermaid).

With a little help from my friends...

So I've been so busy lately that I decided to hire an assistant for the blog. She'll basically organise my day and take care of some basic stuff (ie uploading the posts, feed me vitamins while I sleep).

So, yeah, I'd like to welcome Olivia to the team. I think she's going to be instrumental in taking WTOMH to the next step (television).

Nice Rack

So I've been cheating on my girlfriend with a coat rack lately.

It's basically awesome. So many thin/model-like arms and limbs protruding from her (it's a female coat rack) slender body.

But it would never last. She's not “marriage material”.

Cruel Intentions

I hit someone with a cat o' nine tails today.

PETA were outraged. They sent me a stern letter saying “just because the cat has a deformity doesn't mean you can abuse it. On the contrary, freak animals need to be loved and adored even more than normal cats.”

I got told...