Hey, Fritzel. What's new?

"Oh, not much, Jobe. Just been readin'"

Not Another Movie

Guys, just a quick post to let you know that I have a movie coming out that I wrote/directed/starred in (but didn't produce). It's called 'Not Another Movie' and it's a parody movie about movies.

It's pretty sarcastic.

A Poem

Onion bag on floor
So misunderstood; I understand you
Let me shed your pent up tears
Onion bag and I forever

The Eyes Have It

My father had eyes in the back of his head.

I was thankful that he didn't pass it on to me. I had a hard enough time fitting in at school as it was without such an obvious mutation.

Not What I Ordered

So I'm pretty charismatic with ladies.

I went into this coffee shop the other day and there was a cute chick pouring coffee. She was fairly pale and had really tiny tits.

I went to order at the counter and said "can I have a flat white?" and pointed to the cute chick and laughed cheekily.

Pretty hilarious.

But then I felt a bit awkward saying "actually, I'll have a long black".