BURN!

Totally slammed my girlfriend today.

She cheats on me heaps and I caught her out today. She goes "he means nothing to me" and I go "What.... JUST LIKE THIS RELATIONSHIP?!?!" and then I ran off and wept but fuck it was great.

All Aboard

You know when you get on a train and you smell piss and you think it's that guy over there. But you get closer and you realise it's not him, it's the whole carriage that smells like piss.

And somehow that's comforting?

Treelings

So I keep having these dreams where I (somehow) sodomise small trees.

The dream books aren't giving me clear guidance as to what this means.