Happenings

The other day I nearly died of embarrassment.

Yes, getting AIDS is very embarrassing.

The Logies, Live

Oh.My.God. I have never seen so much coke in my life.

The Logies, Live

someone just smuggloed a whole bbq chicken into the afterparty and gave me a drumbstick

legend!

The Logies, Live

So it turns out that "I used to get molested as a child by my father while your show was on in the background" is a good way to get a certain gold Logie nominee to stop asking you why you don't watch his show.

The Logies, Live

I was just talking to one of the stars of the first season of Underbelly about what we did this weekend.

I said that yesterday I did a lot of baking.

He misheard it as "bacon" and said "yeah I've done a few fat chicks lately. They go pretty hard. I like it when they sweat on me."

I misheard that has "I've done a few cupcakes lately. They go pretty hard. I like it when they sweat on me." I asked him what he meant by sweating cupcakes and we found out that confusion had been created by our mishearings.

The Logies, Live

I've already spotted eight Channel 7 "starlettes" not wearing any panties.

The Logies, Live

The red carpet is more of a burgundy, really.

Clipped

So I was recording the video for my new single the other day. It's pretty great. Basically, I walk towards the camera and there are all these strangers hanging around on the street. So it's a pretty authentic streetscape.

Attn: Person that did the mX crossword in the train the other day

Seriously dude. How did you not get "gulf" as 2 down?

You had the U and F out and the clue was "chasm". Fucking hell.

Practical Joke

1. Take years to develop calluses on your fingers.

2. Order a coffee.

3. Call the waiter over and say it's not hot enough. Stick your finger in an prove it.

4. Throw the scalding hot coffee at the face of the waiter and say "haha just kidding... calluses baby!"

Australia Decides

Hey guys,

So I've been nominated for 9 Logies tonight at the Logies.

I've decided that I'm going to do some live "blogging" during the day and night and ceremony to give you all an insight into what it is to be a famous for a day.