Hand Job

Oh, man, am I ever glad that Coke have brought out new bottles that are easier to hold.

Before them, I couldn't hold on to a bottle of Coke to save my life.

I was all "arrrrrghhhhh, dropped my Cooooooke! Now what'll I driiiiink!"

On The Nose

I was dating a really cute girl a while ago who suggested to my that I should try that nasal spray that gives you longer lasting sex because I always went really quickly.

I was really hurt, so I dumped her and started going out with a really ugly girl. Now the sex lasts for ages.