Ice Cold

I'd been seeing her for a while and I was pretty close to breaking up with her because she had very few redeeming features. But then one night I went to her house and fucked her and stayed over and found out she has a great fridge with the best ice cube dispenser in the fridge door ever.

Not long ago, she started asking me for a commitment. I didn't want to really spend more time with her, but I decided to offer moving in with her so I could use her fridge. I thought I'd eventually get sick of the fridge with the ice dispenser and then I could leave her and the fridge with the ice dispenser.

The problem is, I haven't gotten sick of the fridge and the ice dispenser. I still love the fridge and the ice dispenser. It's gotten to the point that I can't see a future WITHOUT the fridge and ice dispenser in my life.

Sure, I could leave her and get my own fridge with an ice dispenser, but what if it isn't as good as her one? What if I ruin everything?

So I think I'm going to ask her to marry me. I can't face the prospect of her leaving me and taking the fridge with the ice dispenser out of my life.

Sure, I hate her more and more with every passing day, but I think my love for the fridge and the ice dispenser outweighs my hate for her...